as we continue to wait everyday to open an email holding good news in regards to our adoption, i reflected on what it means to wait..... and God showed up in a big way....to turn this wait for our children, the completion of our family, this long journey that seems to have been going on so long in our hearts, but started in reality not long ago.....to turn this wait into praise back to Him.
wait
verb (used without object)
1.
to remain inactive or in a state of repose, as until something expected happens
2.
(of things) to be available or in readiness
3.
to remain neglected for a time
4.
to postpone or delay something or to be postponed or delayed
5.
i let all that wash over me.
to look forward to eagerly
my mind immediately went to our Savior as i read this definition.
my heart broke as i thought of Him expecting, for all of His earthly and human life, rejection from those who should never have rejected him, expecting a gruesome death that He would face all alone on the cross...Him who had never known sin, baring all the sin of the entire world....all of my sin.
i was convicted as i read of His readiness... how He took every minute He wasn't reaching out to those in need of Him, to connect with His Father...He went to the Source of all strength and power and wisdom...that was the only thing that He needed to sustain Him....it was life and food and breath to Him to connect with His Father.
i rejoiced that He was only neglected for a time! He rose victorious! and because of this truth, my debt was paid and i am now an heir with Christ!
i thanked Him that He did not delay in the pursuit of my soul.... that He "drew me out of deep waters" at just the right time. i thanked Him that He, even now, is eagerly awaiting the moment that the Father tells Him it's time to bring His children home and bind up and mend and heal and fix all the brokenness in our world.
i let all that wash over me.
i pondered.
i prayed.
i pray.
i want to follow Christ's example in OUR wait.
i desire to be found faithful, as long as this journey takes... expecting with joy and grace and patience as we await the blessing of 2 more precious children that the Father is placing in our family.
i pray to always be available to accept whatever this journey holds and however it ends up looking like.... to be ready for any twists and turns...any joy, pain or sorrow that we may encounter on this path that we are following Him on....to be able wait joyfully, in hope and expectancy, for God to grow us and change us in this process of trusting without borders or conditions....this place of surrender.
i ask for strength to endure the time that lies ahead while having a posture and attitude of praise, thanksgiving, patience, hope, immense joy and abounding peace in knowing that the Father knows the plans He has for our family and that it will all happen in His perfect timing.
i also ask to NEVER forget the immense loss and pain and anguish that our children have experienced/ are experiencing...that by their need to be adopted into our family, it means they have experienced tremendous hurt and trauma no child should have to face. i pray to be able to meet them in their pain and feel their hurt; honor and respect their past and the life of their birth parents and be able to walk with them on their journey of healing.
i eagerly await the day we see our sweet kids' faces and can call out their names in our prayers..... i long for the day i can hold them in my arms and walk with them, hand in hand, on their journey to Jesus...... their faithful and everloving Heavenly Father, Who has fought for them, and will continue to fight for them.... i can hardly wait to one day be able to introduce them to the Healer of all hurt, sickness, pain and suffering and to be able to laugh with them and cry with them as they experience the true and lasting healing that only He can bring.
“Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west… Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth.” – Isaiah 43:5-6
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| this photo- google images |
until then, i choose to worship in the wait.
“The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.” -Psalm 126:3
